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Unpopular in School, weird behavior?

So I am merely posting this for the discussion I already have my therapist that I work with :-) So but as a kid I was not very popular, I was not in the group and even though it is long time ago, it might still apply to why I feel uncertain and perhaps not deserving of real friendship, is this quite common though? Because whenever I am with very popular people I feel this enormous heaviness to my soul that I can't explain,yet there are other people who I feel less stifled and I can free associate more without this stuck in my mind thing? Again is this common, just posting this for the discussion itself, I already have Nicolai as my go to therapist.
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