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Could not remember the good parts of my childhood

I had the opportunity to work with Grant at his home on Hornby Island. During our discussions, we noticed that I did not have any recollections of positive experiences. I then noticed that there were gaps in my memories of childhood, and the memories I did have were focused on difficult experiences or relationships. ( I think it has been like this for years, but I was not concerned about it, it did not seem relevant. Over the last few months, I had been focused on exploring my negative emotions and experiences in the present moment and my childhood using EFT.)

We noticed this due to discussions about future career aspirations or plans. I related experiences of being blocked about positive future career or life experiences. Grant suggested that we explore unconditional love, because I had been going through a divorce and other difficult relationships.

Through exploring unconditional love, I began to notice that I had access to childhood positive experiences. It was kind of like waking up to what was already there, like re-remembering. It was not like transcendental, it was 'oh, there was good stuff!'. Like a sort of confusion about why didn't I remember this before, what was that about?

Now, I get the sense of some gaps. I feel like I have 60% of positive memories, which is dramatically more than before. A sense that is impossible to guess actually how many positive memories I have, really. Yesterday I would have said that my childhood was all crap. 

With this work came the sense of career opportunities that beforehand seemed blocked, or too fraught with problems to even fully imagine. The sense of possibility, increasing the view or perspective, the experience of my life as being a lot more positive than I thought it was, is exciting. Thanks Grant!

[Grant notes: We see this 'loss of childhood positive memories' problem in a surprising number of clients (and therapists). The standard way of treating this problem is rather complicated, so I decided to try an 'off-label' approach to his problem to see if it would work. The reason I chose that was because I suspected this issue was set off due to his divorce and issues with partners. Having him be able to unconditionally love her would most likely reflect in the same experience inside himself between the male and female halves of his awareness, helping to 'pull them together' again.]

Comments

  • Well that is interesting.

    In the past, I used to remember childhood memories to help me feel good. This is actually taught in hyposis schools. Oddly, between 40 to 60 % of people have a hard time remembering their childhood or any positive memory at all ! Many picked recent good memories, but not childhood ones. That clearly appears as dysfonctionnal, since many reported having no good memorie at all (really, not even ONE in your whole childhood ?). Then, with training, they were able to do so.

    After the Inner Peace process, my childhood changed big time ! "It is never to late to have a happy childhood". Well, I guess I turned off the traumas that were inhibiting me. Or is it because the Inner Peace brings all traumas to 0, and thus regressing is easier because you just go to one place without activating all traumas in between ?

    Now, it happens to me often that I recollect childhood memories, it makes me happy and grateful, like it is turning my states "on" especially Underlying Happiness.

    Writing this, it makes me wonder if I have some associations left, or dominant issue.
  • edited February 2018
    Interesting!  I was thinking of this just this week, as I've been transferring old family videos. 

    Gaetan,

    "After the Inner Peace process, my childhood changed big time ! "It is never to late to have a happy childhood". Well, I guess I turned off the traumas that were inhibiting me. Or is it because the Inner Peace brings all traumas to 0, and thus regressing is easier because you just go to one place without activating all traumas in between?"

    Did the IP process change the way you felt about your childhood?  How much (from % to %)?  I guess my whole family could use that.  I tried it and it didn't seem to be going anywhere, then thought maybe it's for the best if I can't feel the trauma anymore to heal it.  (I was under the impression that the Inner Peace Process doesn't resolve the traumas.  Or is there new information I need to read? :)  )
  • Daniel,

    The Inner Peace does not resolve traumas :-)

    Otherwise, we would be living in a different world ! Did you read Grant's books by the way ?

    The Inner Peace shut down the emotionnal charge of traumas in the present. In other words, when you are in the present, you don't feel negative emotions from the past.

    However, you still feel negative emotions in the present that are from traumas. If you have an easy stress-free life, no much emotionnal activation at all ! It's all positive. But if your life is really stressful, then you feel a lot of stress. Just, it would be much less stressful because you go back to peace quickly after the event.

    When I look at my childhood from my point of view in the present, I see much positivity : all my learnings and discoveries, adventures, feeling good at home, time with my brothers, warmth of my parents, and so on...
    I don't see any traumas. That's because I'm still in the present, and I don't focus on any specific event.

    If you do regression however, you will notice the traumas are still there.

    It is hard to give you a percentage of change. Because since I went into Inner Peace (4 years ago), I also healed A LOT of other stuff, including biographical traumas from childhood. Anyway, before the IP I would have said my childhood was average, a little negative. After it, I was saying my childhood was super cool ! So that's a big change. And at that point, I've already been doing hypnosis for 10 years... hypnosis didn't change my whole childhood, peak state did !

    Inner Peace make it harder to find your traumas in the present. That is a GOOD thing ! After all, why would you constantly activate them ?

    If you are doing healing work however, it is easy to get used to this. After a while, you realise not having the Inner Peace was dysfonctionnal. With training, you will find traumas easily. It will be actually much easier to do trauma healing, because you know you can activate these traumas without risking to feel so bad afterward if you don't heal them : you just go back to peace.

    I've had many clients told me they went to see a therapist who regressed them at childhood traumas, but didn't succeed in healing the trauma. Then the client would feel very bad after the session, sometimes for weeks ! As a therapist, I hope my clients to feel better after our work, not worse.

    Also, Inner Peace is definetely protecting you from what we call trauma flooding, and also from being overwhelmed in case you hit an issue that's hard to face and heal.
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